Often times in life, when we reach a crossroads we are faced with the saying, “When one door closes another one opens”. As cliché as that may sound, that especially rings true as I type these words. As I prepare myself to finish up my last few weeks in my CEP 807 Capstone course, I am faced with the fact that as the minutes, hours and days tick by, the door that opened when I began the Master’s in Educational Technology Program is surely beginning to close. I have said it before, and it is ever so important here, in this essay. When we get to the end of a journey, we may be surprised at the path that the journey ended up following. The path we originally set out for ourselves isn’t the one we followed but somehow, some way, we have reached that ever so important destination accompanied by learning experiences that we’d never even imagined we would face.
 

When I began this journey in 2013 I was in a place where I had to save myself in order to remain an educator. I was so stressed out and tired of teaching that I saw this program as my way out of the classroom. I needed something else, something more, that would equip me with the skills to make the transition from a classroom teacher to an instructional coach. Little did I know, that dream would quickly fade away. As I worked through and completed my very first semester, my eyes began to see teaching and learning from a completely different place. CEP 810 was the first course where I was truly forced to reexamine what teaching and learning really looked like. As I struggled to learn how to knit, I began to see just how difficult learning can be for a student. It was through constant feedback, practice and redoing that I was able to master my new skill and this was powerful. During those eight weeks I learned something, if you want students to learn, they have to have the chance to try and try again until they can master the content before them.

 

As my thoughts about my own teaching practice began to shift, I realized one thing, this place was not going to be the place for me. Day by day I watched those in charge push tech integration with no framework. Teachers had no support and when we tried things, we consistently failed. The system I was a part of was created to continually doom Detroit’s urban youth. No longer could I stand there with the truth growing within me and watch what I knew was going to crash and burn. In order to become the person I needed to be, I had to make a change.

 

But before I could make my first change, I experienced my first true roadblock. Not too long after my second semester began, I discovered that my husband and I were expecting our first child. Now to some, the natural question that follows is, what does having a child have to do with your Master’s degree? My response is a simple one: a lot. As I transitioned through my second and third semesters as a student in the MAET program, my life changed. I was now a working mother of a premature baby, who also happened to be working on a Master’s degree.  The things that I saw that bothered me before, were now the vain of my existence. I had to do something; not only for myself but for all of the children who like my son, would be in classrooms across the country expected to use technology as a part of their daily learning experiences.

 

As I transitioned into motherhood and from a school I loved to a place where I was the new kid on the block, I was faced with figuring out what the MAET program now meant to me. I had to once again reevaluate my goals and purposes as a part of the Master’s in Educational Technology program. Before my son was born, I had managed to complete eight of my ten required courses and after a year off to be a mother, it was time to dive back in. I was now in a new school district and once again my purpose for the Master’s in Educational Technology had shifted, but I wasn’t sure where I had landed. I now worked in a building that was shiny and new. Each classroom was filled with 1:1 technology and all of the tech tools one could possibly dream of. However, there was something different here too. Even though this building burst at the seams with the amount of resources at the teacher’s disposal, very little was happening with technology. Some teachers were using it and just redefining the purpose. While others used their MacBook carts as a storage place for the students to turn in their work. As a teacher and a student, I then began to wonder, how can I change technology integration in my new environment? As I looked at the issues present in my new building, I was reminded of my time in CEP 800. CEP 800 was a course that forced me to look at the true purpose of technology tools. As I thought of this course and my practice, I was reminded of one thing: tools are fine, but does the purpose of the tool make sense within the content? As I grappled with this thought, I began to shift my thinking once again. If I am going to be a better teacher and help those around me, I have to make sure that technology usage is purposeful and implicit so that the required learning goal is achieved.

 

As I began to re-enter the MAET world in Fall of 2015, I entered the program once again with a whole new purpose. I no longer worked for the district where I thought I might become an instructional coach. I was just a 9th grade English teacher. However, I wasn’t the same teacher that I had been in 2013. I was now in year 5 of my practice, and I realized that the dream I once had no longer applied. I just wanted to be the best teacher that I could be. As this semester began, I was unsure of who my best self was. But as the weeks have passed, I have realized something. Being the best teacher I can be, means that I set and follow my own path. I know that I can’t change the minds of everyone in the building, but I can change the minds of the students who sit in front of me every day.

 

For many people when they finish a degree of study, it’s about the pieces of paper they earn. More money, more accolades, more things to decorate the office walls. For me, earning this degree has a whole other purpose. As a graduate of the Master’s in Educational Technology program, I now have the tools to integrate technology into my content in a way that will increase the knowledge base of my students. I am no longer just the “techie teacher” who uses technology because it’s forward thinking. I am the educator who uses technology because it provides my students with opportunities that they may not have had under any other conditions. My teaching practice is now wrapped around frameworks and research that allow me to teach to the task, not the tool. My students can now see English as a place where they not only gain “English” skills, they are allowed to grapple with their thinking and learning with someone by their side who is prepared to teach and guide them all while using technology in a purposeful manner.

 

As a teacher, my sense of self has also shifted thanks to the MAET program. I didn’t see myself as a leader when this program initially began, but CEP 815 has changed that. Even though I may never run a school, I know who I am now and I am okay with the woman I see in the mirror. Through CEP 815, I began to develop a presence I had previously lacked. I now know that I am capable and intelligent enough to lead my classroom.  As my personal confidence shifted, so did my pedagogy. My original teaching philosophy spoke about the importance of knowing your students. “As an educator I believe that one has to be aware of the faces who sit before them to effectively teach… A great educator has to be ready to use their students’ lives and experiences to simultaneously learn about them and teach them. As a teacher, this is my goal.” (Edwards, 2013)

As an educator, this goal has not changed, but through the Master’s in Educational Technology program, my pedagogy has transformed. I know that with the right tools, resources and content knowledge, I can reach my students and teach them. Technology gives teachers affordances they may have not had under any other circumstances, and I want to use those affordances to the best of my ability.

           

When I began this journey to become a teacher in 2006, all I knew is that I wanted to change the world. I wasn’t sure how I’d do it, but I was sure that by teaching kids that would at least give me a head start. Looking back, I am proud of the sense of ambition I had then. It carried me through the hard times and allowed me to be the woman that I am today. When I add my journey in the MAET program to my list of life experiences, I can say that I am still changing the world, each and every day with the students who sit in front of me.

 

My concept of teaching and learning has shifted a bit. I no longer see teaching and learning as if, I the teacher know it all. My students and I are engaged in a working relationship. I am the leader but, we work together and learn from each other. Through the MAET program, I have realized that true teaching with technology must be grounded in a purpose. That purpose must be evident for students so that true teaching and learning can take place.

 

In addition to having a foundation that I previously lacked, the biggest impact that the Master’s in Educational Technology program has had on me, is my level of confidence. Over the last two years, I have watched myself struggle, stumble and succeed as a student in this program. As a classroom teacher, your level of confidence is quite often knocked down. Sometimes you wonder, if you are good enough and if you can truly do this. I must say that even though having the knowledge and foundation is a great thing, being able to walk away from this program with confidence in myself and confidence in my practice as an educator is my biggest takeaway. As I stare at my 3.9 GPA, I know that I’ve got this. I have proven to Michigan State University that I can keep up even when life gets in the way and this degree is proof to myself, that I can do it.

           

No longer am I the teacher I used to be. I used to wonder if I was any good, or if I had a real clue of what teaching and learning really was. As I type these words, I know I do. I know what teaching and learning is and I know what good teaching and learning looks like, all thanks to the Master’s in Educational Technology program. I am no longer the novice educator, who is just getting her feet wet, I am the seasoned teacher who knows and understands the importance of technology integration in educational settings. I have earned my place as a graduate of the MAET program and I am ready to see what will happen when this door closes. I am sure that I now have the key that will lead me to another door. This door, I will be able to open, all thanks to the Master’s in Educational Technology Program.